Articles Written by Tom Rohrer
Addiction Recovery:
Addiction Quiz (A PDF FILE)
Introduction to Recovery (A PDF FILE)
Changing:
Creating:
Creating a Full and Happy Life (A PDF FILE)
Coaching:
Coaching (A PDF FILE)
Past And Present Newsletters:
Positive Psychology:
Positive Psychology: The Future of Psychology? (A PDF FILE)
Psychotherapy:
Dr. Rohrer's Approaches to Psychotherapy (A PDF FILE)
Relationships:
Relationships (A PDF FIle)
Becoming a Fair Fighter (A PDF FILE)
Structure for Success:
Structure Determines Your Outcome (A PDF File)
So where do I start?
“So what approach will serve me?”
“Where am I on my path to my dreams?”
“Am I ready to build ‘My Structure For Success™?”
So what do I want?
If you know what you want, you are indeed fortunate. If you don’t, you can start by just asking yourself that question. If you want external resources, there are many available. See my article on “Figuring Out What I Want” in Writings. There are assessments that may help you in the Links and Information section. Whether you are making progress, struggling, or starting over, the process of creating your dreams is the same.
Whatever you want, the process can be much easier, quicker and more rewarding than you may think. Besides, if you are engaged in creating your dreams, what could be better? It is the journey that brings the joy, engagement and purpose, not just the arriving. The arriving can be a let down. For example, after winning the Super bowl, Dallas Cowboy Quarterback, Troy Aikman said, “Is that all there is?”
Happiness: Americans place a high value on happiness. In 1996, ABC News broadcast a Washington Post poll of 1500 adults, which asked, “If you had just one wish for your children, would it be for wealth, high intelligence, a successful job or career, or an overall happy life?” The results were:
|
Wealth |
4% |
|
High Intelligence |
10% |
|
Successful Job or Career |
12% |
|
An Overall Happy Life |
71% |
You can increase your level of happiness at least 10% by using the tools and strategies of Positive Psychology. See my article on “Positve Psychology: Future of Psychology,” and “Creating A Full & Happy Life” in the Writings section.
At the foundation of Positive Psychology are the Virtues and Signature Strengths. See my article on “Signature Strengths” in the Writings section. You can take a free assessment of your personal strengths by going to the “Assessments” section and linking to the web site.
Another significant aspect of Positive Psychology is Emotional Intelligence ("EI"), known by many names like, street smarts, social skills, interpersonal skills and others. Successful people usually have a high level of EI. It is essential for effectiveness in interpersonal situations such as the workplace, romance, friendships, parenting and team sports. The skill sets learned in EI are invaluable.
The final aspect of Positive Psychology that I will highlight is spirituality. Spirituality adds another vital dimension of reality and intelligence. Holding a spiritual belief is a significant factor in living a long, happy and well-balanced life.
Resilience: Have you ever said something like, “I need to bounce back from…(this situation)?” Dealing with a trauma or significant problem can knock you down. Yet, for many people it is the day-to-day grind that eats at the fiber of our strengths, values and happiness. Resilience is the ability to cope with stressors, to recover quickly from setbacks, big and small, and to resist the negative risk factors of future harmful events.
Anyone can benefit from building his or her resilience and it is very learnable. There are many specific skills that will help you develop a resilient style. Developing a resilient style is very valuable.
So what approach will serve me?
Do you think that a self-help approach will be all that you need to achieve your goals? Would the interaction and engagement of a seminar or the on-going structure of a group be the right approach? Or would the personalized work of individual sessions serve you best, or maybe a combination of options?
Structure: Structure creates your outcome. Therefore you need to be clear that the structure you choose is the correct one. See the article on “Structure” in Writings.
Problem Solving: The ability to problem solve is extremely valuable. The key is to be able to look at the problem and accurately assess it. If you aren’t sure of the solution, find a resource to help you. See the “Problem Solving” article in the Writings section.
Creating: The structure for creating is different than the structure for problem solving. Creating is about developing something that doesn’t have to exist, but you love it enough to use your valuable time, energy and resources to create it.
Where am I on my path to my dreams?
So honestly, where are you in your travels? Do you have a clear, accurate and complete map? Will you connect with your motivation so when you come to your inevitable emotional blocks and the realistic obstructions you will move past them?
With honesty, accurate thinking, and a clear map you can clarify where you are at any point in time and map out the remainder of your journey. If you were piloting your airplane (your life) and you wanted to go to Hawaii, would you set your autopilot on “A Warm Place?” Being extremely detailed is unnecessary. You just need enough details to know what your picture looks like.
Am I ready to build “My Structure For Success™?”
Are you ready to commit to your dreams by setting yourself up in a structure to achieve them? Every moment of every day you make choices. Doing nothing is a choice to do nothing. Taking any reasonable action will be better than doing nothing.
Structure creates your outcome. Therefore you must develop a correct structure. Even if you are a successful person, you need to maintain structure for continued success. See my article on “Structure” in Writings.
What are the steps that will move you from where you are to the successful completion of your goals? You want to be as clear as possible about every step to completion. Likely you will need to add steps and sub-steps.
Are you making the choices that will set yourself up to take the needed steps and become successful? If not, what can you do right this moment to set yourself up for success? Also, what will you do next and by when? I am here to help you get started in developing the structure you need to become successful.